Hats Off!

This week was spring break for me, so my wife picked up some extra hours at her job. That meant that I spent the whole week home with my two kids. I just have to say, "Hats off to my wife and all other stay at home moms."

Don't get me wrong. I loved spending time with my kids. We got to play and do things that I usually don't get to do with them. Yet, I do have to say that I was completely worn out at the end of each day.

Just trying to get out of the house was a feat in itself. I had to time everything just right. I had to strategically shower while the two kids were occupied doing something else. I then had to coordinate getting them both dressed, diaper bag packed, meals eaten, etc. There was a lot of analytical thinking that goes into that type of production. In fact, if someone would take the time to diagram the process on paper it might look like something you could find in a biochemistry textbook. (see diagram)

I have discovered that there is both an art and a science to wrangling children all by yourself. The science aspect deals with thinking through your game plan and developing an efficient flow of events. The art is getting a feel for the proper timing and knowing what motivational factors will be effective in keeping the troops moving and on schedule. Trust me, if you say, "Time to use the restroom," but the proper directive should have been, "You need to use the potty," then you spend an extra five minutes just overcoming that one obstacle. Even your phrasing needs to be intentional and on point. Losing five minutes at the wrong point along the chain of events could actually end up costing you twenty minutes!

The other daily event that requires the precision and dedication of a master orchestra conductor is in putting the kids down for a nap. The goal is to have both of them go down at the same time so that you actually have 5-45 minutes to do something that you would like to do -- like use the restroom yourself! I have found that getting them to lay down and fall asleep at all is an accomplishment. Getting it to happen for both at the same time is akin to a miracle. I am happy to report that I was successful in this endeavor more than once this week (though not every time).

Well, Sofia now wants dessert and Christopher is screaming for some yet-to-be-determined reason. My 4 minutes of allotted freedom is up.